Photo: Laura Purdie Salas
Wake up your poetry brains with 15 Words or Less (guidelines are here)!
Three things this makes me think of:
1) The Wizard of Oz
2) Calla lilies
3) Doing India ink calligraphy with my big sister
And here’s my first draft!
Weekend Visit Home from College
She brought
…Paper
…Ink
…Pen
dip, stroke, dip
Time stilled in
Eagles logo’s precise lines
–Laura Purdie Salas, all rights reserved
Now it’s your turn! Have fun and stick to 15 WORDS OR LESS! (Title doesn’t count toward word count:>)
344 Responses
FAIRY BED
Open tiny eyes
Stretch small limbs
Push back petals from the head
My Daylilly bed
Made me think of one of those canopy beds…
15 word limit really got me this time 😛 My first edition made a bit more sense but… Got to be creative with the limit! 🙂
When I read the first line, I was looking at the eyes of a child. Love the surprise ending.
Lovely, Amelia–I think it works, especially if you maybe add a colon or dash after head. That way, you don’t feel like there’s an “of” missing there:>) I really felt the limit this time, too. My original was 20 words, and it was much more clear that my sister and I were doing a calligraphy project (a cool logo for the band The Eagles) back in the 70s when she was home from college for the weekend. Poetry is a tough taskmaster! But I think you packed an enormous amount into your 15 words. Nicely done!
Lovely! Fairies have to sleep somewhere!
Love the perspective, tiny fairy-large lily. You made me imagine stories starting from your poem.
I see a tiny fairy in her daylily bed here, Amelia. A perfect flowery spot for a tiny one. I like Laura’s colon idea. Since I love Thumbelina and my special Fairy Tale Book by Marie Ponsot and Adrienne Segur, this really speaks to me. Lovely poetry, Amelia. So happy to see you continuing regularly.
Magical…
I love this magical image! 🙂
Loved looking back on the image after reading your poem…and then my journey began! Can you truly imagine sleeping beneath folded day lily petals? I think it really would look like the picture — with light just barely seen through the layers and dark edges of each petal showing where they overlap. Nice! I want to sleep there!
Thanks for the great comments, everyone! The : or ; is a great idea 🙂
FAIRY BED
Open tiny eyes
Stretch small limbs
Push back petals from the head
My Daylilly bed
Made me think of one of those canopy beds…
15 word limit really got me this time 😛 My first edition made a bit more sense but… Got to be creative with the limit! 🙂
When I read the first line, I was looking at the eyes of a child. Love the surprise ending.
Lovely, Amelia–I think it works, especially if you maybe add a colon or dash after head. That way, you don’t feel like there’s an “of” missing there:>) I really felt the limit this time, too. My original was 20 words, and it was much more clear that my sister and I were doing a calligraphy project (a cool logo for the band The Eagles) back in the 70s when she was home from college for the weekend. Poetry is a tough taskmaster! But I think you packed an enormous amount into your 15 words. Nicely done!
Lovely! Fairies have to sleep somewhere!
Love the perspective, tiny fairy-large lily. You made me imagine stories starting from your poem.
I see a tiny fairy in her daylily bed here, Amelia. A perfect flowery spot for a tiny one. I like Laura’s colon idea. Since I love Thumbelina and my special Fairy Tale Book by Marie Ponsot and Adrienne Segur, this really speaks to me. Lovely poetry, Amelia. So happy to see you continuing regularly.
Magical…
I love this magical image! 🙂
Loved looking back on the image after reading your poem…and then my journey began! Can you truly imagine sleeping beneath folded day lily petals? I think it really would look like the picture — with light just barely seen through the layers and dark edges of each petal showing where they overlap. Nice! I want to sleep there!
Thanks for the great comments, everyone! The : or ; is a great idea 🙂
Quilled
ink
will spill
on the blank page
forever
making its mark
across time.
I don’t think Quilled is a word, but the image of a hand holding a quill pen and sweeping words across the page came to my mind. How once you put the pen down to the page, it’s there forever.
I love “quilled” as an adjective here, and its meaning is perfectly clear whether it’s a dictionary word or not! Sets a mood, almost rhymes with spill…what more could you ask?
I also think how careful one must have had to be when conserving ink & paper-& you’re right, once there, it’s forever.
Through a book or a poem, and our writing, we do (sometimes) manage to leave our mark over time. This reminds me of the power of reading. And how much we need to nurture the love of words in our children.
If poets don’t have the authority to create words, then who does? I love “Quilled.” And it’s certainly better than “twerk” for goodness sake! Love your poem’s message too.
Oh, I love this! I think “Quilled” is perfect.
Though quilled is a word, it isn’t used in this sense. But it should be! Like penned. Swirling ink as it is quilled and spilled upon the page… I can see it.
Very nice, Margaret!
What a cool poem! I definitely love “quilled”
Quilled
ink
will spill
on the blank page
forever
making its mark
across time.
I don’t think Quilled is a word, but the image of a hand holding a quill pen and sweeping words across the page came to my mind. How once you put the pen down to the page, it’s there forever.
I love “quilled” as an adjective here, and its meaning is perfectly clear whether it’s a dictionary word or not! Sets a mood, almost rhymes with spill…what more could you ask?
I also think how careful one must have had to be when conserving ink & paper-& you’re right, once there, it’s forever.
Through a book or a poem, and our writing, we do (sometimes) manage to leave our mark over time. This reminds me of the power of reading. And how much we need to nurture the love of words in our children.
If poets don’t have the authority to create words, then who does? I love “Quilled.” And it’s certainly better than “twerk” for goodness sake! Love your poem’s message too.
Oh, I love this! I think “Quilled” is perfect.
Though quilled is a word, it isn’t used in this sense. But it should be! Like penned. Swirling ink as it is quilled and spilled upon the page… I can see it.
Very nice, Margaret!
What a cool poem! I definitely love “quilled”
This was a tough one, Laura.
Twister
Tearing through town,
tumbling walls with wild breath,
you shredded life,
transformed survivors into
family.
? Andria W. Rosenbaum
Ahh, we think alike, though in different forms. I like your ending.
I especially like “wild breath”!
I do as well!
Love the last two lines — hope from horror.
Because of the flooding in Colorado, there has lately been tv stories about people getting to know each other for the first time although they were neighbors. You described this beautifully, & I like “wild breath”!
I love how you kept the “t” words going, tumbling walls, transforming survivors, tearing through towns and making a family. I really like your poem, Andria.
So powerful, Andria. Transforming survivors into family– yes.
Powerful poem! I especially like your description in lines 2 and 3, and the hopeful ending.
Loved “transformed survivors into family”.
Very powerful, great last line.
Haunting–I LOVE the wild breath!
This was a tough one, Laura.
Twister
Tearing through town,
tumbling walls with wild breath,
you shredded life,
transformed survivors into
family.
? Andria W. Rosenbaum
Ahh, we think alike, though in different forms. I like your ending.
I especially like “wild breath”!
I do as well!
Love the last two lines — hope from horror.
Because of the flooding in Colorado, there has lately been tv stories about people getting to know each other for the first time although they were neighbors. You described this beautifully, & I like “wild breath”!
I love how you kept the “t” words going, tumbling walls, transforming survivors, tearing through towns and making a family. I really like your poem, Andria.
So powerful, Andria. Transforming survivors into family– yes.
Powerful poem! I especially like your description in lines 2 and 3, and the hopeful ending.
Loved “transformed survivors into family”.
Very powerful, great last line.
Haunting–I LOVE the wild breath!
TWISTER!
This red sky at night
gave us a fright,
a whirling, swirling
bone-chilling sight.
Great to see the rhyme and the ‘whirling, swirling’. Tornadoes are scary!
Oh, I have never been in or seen a tornado and I don’t want to. I am always amazed at the sight of the destruction, truly bone-chilling.
Frightening! Fits in well with a Halloween theme too… I see a squadron of witches on broomsticks, capes whirling and swirling.
Bone-chilling is right! I like all the rhymes.
Twisters in the midwest seemed to come out of green skies, but this image of a blood-red sky tornado would be even more chilling a sight!
Yes–more, more, more! This is totally the beginning of a wonderful, scary story in verse!
TWISTER!
This red sky at night
gave us a fright,
a whirling, swirling
bone-chilling sight.
Great to see the rhyme and the ‘whirling, swirling’. Tornadoes are scary!
Oh, I have never been in or seen a tornado and I don’t want to. I am always amazed at the sight of the destruction, truly bone-chilling.
Frightening! Fits in well with a Halloween theme too… I see a squadron of witches on broomsticks, capes whirling and swirling.
Bone-chilling is right! I like all the rhymes.
Twisters in the midwest seemed to come out of green skies, but this image of a blood-red sky tornado would be even more chilling a sight!
Yes–more, more, more! This is totally the beginning of a wonderful, scary story in verse!
Come reddened,
sunset skies -
black cape swirls
to hide the wearer.
Ding-dong.
Trick-or-treat.
How seasonal! Can’t wait to see little monsters at my door.
Ah, the Halloween nights when I was young. Now, here, we can and do often get a snowstorm. The kids are hearty souls though. Brrrrrr. I wonder what it is like to see Halloween in warmer climes!!!
Oh how funny, Ellie– I just wrote a comment on Cindy’s poem (before yours) about how it could work with a Halloween theme, and now here’s yours, presented to me as if you just read my mind! Amazing. 🙂
Love the picture you paint with the first four lines!
Your poem made me smile. Yes, that picture could definitely set a Halloween theme.
Oooooohhhh! Love the Halloween spin you put on this. Sweeeeet!
Come reddened,
sunset skies -
black cape swirls
to hide the wearer.
Ding-dong.
Trick-or-treat.
How seasonal! Can’t wait to see little monsters at my door.
Ah, the Halloween nights when I was young. Now, here, we can and do often get a snowstorm. The kids are hearty souls though. Brrrrrr. I wonder what it is like to see Halloween in warmer climes!!!
Oh how funny, Ellie– I just wrote a comment on Cindy’s poem (before yours) about how it could work with a Halloween theme, and now here’s yours, presented to me as if you just read my mind! Amazing. 🙂
Love the picture you paint with the first four lines!
Your poem made me smile. Yes, that picture could definitely set a Halloween theme.
Oooooohhhh! Love the Halloween spin you put on this. Sweeeeet!
I immediately thought of a dancer. http://www.loc.gov/pictures/resource/agc.7a09967/
Isadora Dancers
She
choreographs
bodies
silks
in motion
in space
they dance
a dance
ancient
yet
prescient.
Diane Mayr, all rights reserved
Having been a dancer (not professional) I love this poem. I am sad I stopped dancing. This poems reminds me of the power of our bodies to express and how connected to the wider world it is. Love “silks in motion”.
YES! Love this homage to Isadora Duncan. “Ancient yet prescient” is spot on.
Neat take on the picture! I especially like “silks/in motion” and “ancient/yet/prescient”.
Your take on the picture is a good one. It does seem to represent movement.
I love all the different ideas people have today.
Beautiful!
I can just see the swirl of silks as the dancer moves.
Love the way you show how her dance drew on the ancient and changed the future. And I like the tall, spare look of the poem, too…
If I didn’t have to place the poem within a comment, I definitely would have tried to make it an echo of the flowing shape of the photo. I like to play with shape in a poem.
I immediately thought of a dancer. http://www.loc.gov/pictures/resource/agc.7a09967/
Isadora Dancers
She
choreographs
bodies
silks
in motion
in space
they dance
a dance
ancient
yet
prescient.
Diane Mayr, all rights reserved
Having been a dancer (not professional) I love this poem. I am sad I stopped dancing. This poems reminds me of the power of our bodies to express and how connected to the wider world it is. Love “silks in motion”.
YES! Love this homage to Isadora Duncan. “Ancient yet prescient” is spot on.
Neat take on the picture! I especially like “silks/in motion” and “ancient/yet/prescient”.
Your take on the picture is a good one. It does seem to represent movement.
I love all the different ideas people have today.
Beautiful!
I can just see the swirl of silks as the dancer moves.
Love the way you show how her dance drew on the ancient and changed the future. And I like the tall, spare look of the poem, too…
If I didn’t have to place the poem within a comment, I definitely would have tried to make it an echo of the flowing shape of the photo. I like to play with shape in a poem.
Red
My blood whirls
and my face goes red?
did Cinderella blush
at the ball?
?Kate Coombs
The million dollar question… I hope the answer is yes.
I like question poems. They always leave me thinking! 🙂
Yes, I believe she must have, what with all that dancing, a handsome prince and all the unexpected attention!
I love blood whirling–so unexpected. As is the Cinderella reference. So much hinting at backstory here!
Well, if Cinderella blushed, I am sure it wouldn’t have shown.…she is a princess in waiting after all and we all know princesses are just, different.…now the rest of us, hmmm.…Flushed, sweaty, hair askew.… I can see myself if I really dance all night and the aching feet in those glass slippers, probably none too comfy. As a child I would have wanted one of those gorgeous gowns!! Your poem pulled together the fantasy and the reality. Fun!!
Red
My blood whirls
and my face goes red?
did Cinderella blush
at the ball?
?Kate Coombs
The million dollar question… I hope the answer is yes.
I like question poems. They always leave me thinking! 🙂
Yes, I believe she must have, what with all that dancing, a handsome prince and all the unexpected attention!
I love blood whirling–so unexpected. As is the Cinderella reference. So much hinting at backstory here!
Well, if Cinderella blushed, I am sure it wouldn’t have shown.…she is a princess in waiting after all and we all know princesses are just, different.…now the rest of us, hmmm.…Flushed, sweaty, hair askew.… I can see myself if I really dance all night and the aching feet in those glass slippers, probably none too comfy. As a child I would have wanted one of those gorgeous gowns!! Your poem pulled together the fantasy and the reality. Fun!!
Mother Nature’s Masterpiece
Sailor’s red sky at dawn,
backdrop for black funnel
slurping up swirling,
angry waves.
Love the s sounds, especially slurping.
Thanks Ellie. My first thought was my youngest grandchild, who is in the Navy.
Love “slurping up swirling”. Rolls over the tongue like lemon candy
I didn’t see the ocean at all, and love your ‘slurping up swirling/angry waves’.
Yes, Martha! I like it. NOW I can see an ocean. Creative.
Love those angry waves “slurping up swirling”– you help me to imagine it so well!
I’m going to echo everyone else, but those last two lines are my favorites!
Ah, yes, red sky in the morning…hope they heeded the warning!
Ooooh, love this wind funnel turning tropical storm/hurricane (at least, that’s what I’m picturing). Slurping is great!
Red angry waves.…no matter, I love the ocean! You can take the girl out of the island but not the water out of the girl. Your poem brings me back to childhood!
Mother Nature’s Masterpiece
Sailor’s red sky at dawn,
backdrop for black funnel
slurping up swirling,
angry waves.
Love the s sounds, especially slurping.
Thanks Ellie. My first thought was my youngest grandchild, who is in the Navy.
Love “slurping up swirling”. Rolls over the tongue like lemon candy
I didn’t see the ocean at all, and love your ‘slurping up swirling/angry waves’.
Yes, Martha! I like it. NOW I can see an ocean. Creative.
Love those angry waves “slurping up swirling”– you help me to imagine it so well!
I’m going to echo everyone else, but those last two lines are my favorites!
Ah, yes, red sky in the morning…hope they heeded the warning!
Ooooh, love this wind funnel turning tropical storm/hurricane (at least, that’s what I’m picturing). Slurping is great!
Red angry waves.…no matter, I love the ocean! You can take the girl out of the island but not the water out of the girl. Your poem brings me back to childhood!
elephant fashion
elephant style
burgundy is
the new black
for a while
Fun to see others imagining an elephant, and different looks too. You brought us up to date!
Cyndy,
I so agree with Linda!! I adore that burgandy is the new black, for a while, at least. Neil Gaiman has a piece you can find online about imagination and reading. It is from a talk he gave in England this past Mon. Fabulous.
I knew I couldn’t be the only one who saw an elephant! I love your fashionable take on it.
Fun poem! I love the rhyme and last 3 lines.
I guess if we can have white elephants and pink elephants, why not burgundy!?
elephant fashion
elephant style
burgundy is
the new black
for a while
Fun to see others imagining an elephant, and different looks too. You brought us up to date!
Cyndy,
I so agree with Linda!! I adore that burgandy is the new black, for a while, at least. Neil Gaiman has a piece you can find online about imagination and reading. It is from a talk he gave in England this past Mon. Fabulous.
I knew I couldn’t be the only one who saw an elephant! I love your fashionable take on it.
Fun poem! I love the rhyme and last 3 lines.
I guess if we can have white elephants and pink elephants, why not burgundy!?
I love that the photo called up a good memory, Laura, that “dip, stroke, dip”. I love the picture-much in it!
One On One
Sunset shadows settle,
quieting contact.
His trunk leaned in to feel
exactly what I was.
I love everything about your poem. It makes me feel how gentle a giant can be.
I love that we both saw an elephant, Linda. I also love how you brought in the contact, the peace, the idea that the elephant can be gentle and curious and knowing. Lovely. (Did not see any before I wrote, I never do.….also do you know how to leave a comment on Laura’s newer site here without having to fill in your details each time?)
Thanks Janet-it is fun to see what others ‘see’ & I don’t look until I post. Yes, I don’t have to ‘fill in’ each time.
When you can, please clue me in as to how to let WP know I want to just leave my comment. It gets time-consuming!!! It is the first time this has happened to me. Not sure if it is my computer or what. Probably should just “google” it, that appears to solve many problems these days.
I usually just use Facebook, Janet.
Like you, Linda, I post my poem before I read everyone else’s. What a pleasant surprise it was then to come upon yours! Your words make me want to run to the nearest elephant refuge and hug one of these gentle beasts.
Ooh, I like this elephant one, too. 🙂 Love that first line!
ooh I love the curious elephant. Super last line!
Thank you, Linda. I was so sad when my sister Patty went off to college. She would sometimes send me calligraphy things home, and I just adored them!
This captures a moment beautifully. That last line is such a surprise, to discover that the narrator is THAT close.
I love that the photo called up a good memory, Laura, that “dip, stroke, dip”. I love the picture-much in it!
One On One
Sunset shadows settle,
quieting contact.
His trunk leaned in to feel
exactly what I was.
I love everything about your poem. It makes me feel how gentle a giant can be.
I love that we both saw an elephant, Linda. I also love how you brought in the contact, the peace, the idea that the elephant can be gentle and curious and knowing. Lovely. (Did not see any before I wrote, I never do.….also do you know how to leave a comment on Laura’s newer site here without having to fill in your details each time?)
Thanks Janet-it is fun to see what others ‘see’ & I don’t look until I post. Yes, I don’t have to ‘fill in’ each time.
When you can, please clue me in as to how to let WP know I want to just leave my comment. It gets time-consuming!!! It is the first time this has happened to me. Not sure if it is my computer or what. Probably should just “google” it, that appears to solve many problems these days.
I usually just use Facebook, Janet.
Like you, Linda, I post my poem before I read everyone else’s. What a pleasant surprise it was then to come upon yours! Your words make me want to run to the nearest elephant refuge and hug one of these gentle beasts.
Ooh, I like this elephant one, too. 🙂 Love that first line!
ooh I love the curious elephant. Super last line!
Thank you, Linda. I was so sad when my sister Patty went off to college. She would sometimes send me calligraphy things home, and I just adored them!
This captures a moment beautifully. That last line is such a surprise, to discover that the narrator is THAT close.
savannah sunset
beneath blazing sky
elephant bends trunk, dips in
to pool of water
Janet — I saw a trunk as well! (Perhaps because my daughter and I are reading The One and Only Ivan!)
I have not read it yet!! But I have heard how incredibly powerful it is.….I have many great reads ahead of me.
Just wonderful, Janet! How creative to see an elephant’s trunk 😉
Fun that we both saw an elephant‑I love that image of leaning toward the water!
Oh my… so many elephant-themed poems in a row. Good thing I firmly believe you can never have enough elephants! I love that you sandwiched your elephant between extremes– the blazing sky and the pool of water. And your title is great too!
I like the images in this and the title, too!
Of course, it does look like Savannah sunset. Good one, Janet!
Lovely, Janet. The two words “dips in” completely set the tone for me…that somehow delicate way elephants have of moving, even in harsh conditions and with their great bulk. Those two words matter so much…
savannah sunset
beneath blazing sky
elephant bends trunk, dips in
to pool of water
Janet — I saw a trunk as well! (Perhaps because my daughter and I are reading The One and Only Ivan!)
I have not read it yet!! But I have heard how incredibly powerful it is.….I have many great reads ahead of me.
Just wonderful, Janet! How creative to see an elephant’s trunk 😉
Fun that we both saw an elephant‑I love that image of leaning toward the water!
Oh my… so many elephant-themed poems in a row. Good thing I firmly believe you can never have enough elephants! I love that you sandwiched your elephant between extremes– the blazing sky and the pool of water. And your title is great too!
I like the images in this and the title, too!
Of course, it does look like Savannah sunset. Good one, Janet!
Lovely, Janet. The two words “dips in” completely set the tone for me…that somehow delicate way elephants have of moving, even in harsh conditions and with their great bulk. Those two words matter so much…
Salt then soda,
Seltzer spritz.
Oh what a party!
Sauvignon stain
Terrific‑a new look at this-wine spill!
I see the tipping glass, the spreading stain, the rush for the seltzer and salt. Bravo!!
Written like one who knows…? 😉 Fun poem!
Love the different perspective on the picture and all the “s” words!
Now I wish I had written “souvenir” instead of stain.
Oh well — first draft!
Oh, yes! Souvenir sounds wonderful…good revision!
Super! I once spilled red wine twice in a row on a friend’s new carpet. The next party she bought me a sippy cup lol.
Hahaha–as a perennial stainer, I loved this. If only my stains were elegant sauvignon ones. They are bbq sauce, usually:>) I like the alliteration and how line 3 is a nice break of all those s sounds.
Salt then soda,
Seltzer spritz.
Oh what a party!
Sauvignon stain
Terrific‑a new look at this-wine spill!
I see the tipping glass, the spreading stain, the rush for the seltzer and salt. Bravo!!
Written like one who knows…? 😉 Fun poem!
Love the different perspective on the picture and all the “s” words!
Now I wish I had written “souvenir” instead of stain.
Oh well — first draft!
Oh, yes! Souvenir sounds wonderful…good revision!
Super! I once spilled red wine twice in a row on a friend’s new carpet. The next party she bought me a sippy cup lol.
Hahaha–as a perennial stainer, I loved this. If only my stains were elegant sauvignon ones. They are bbq sauce, usually:>) I like the alliteration and how line 3 is a nice break of all those s sounds.
The Anteater
The ants
scurry
a c r o s s
the ground.
The anteater’s
tongue
r o o t s
all around.
Another animal, Joy. It didn’t occur to me to see that long snout. Love the rhyme, too.
SNOUT would have been better than tongue, then to up the ante on the sibilants I could have used SNIFFS for roots. Thanks Linda.
Love how you are showing your revision process here, Joy! Fun to show my students, thanks!!
Ooooh, what a great take on this photo! Fun to imagine all the ants scurrying around, chased by the anteater’s tongue.
Oh, my gosh… someone else saw an anteater! 🙂 I always write mine before reading the others, so am pleasantly surprised to find that another person saw the same thing I did.
I like your rhyme and how you used the word “roots”.
I love the rhythmic simplicity of this, Joy. Fun to read aloud!
The Anteater
The ants
scurry
a c r o s s
the ground.
The anteater’s
tongue
r o o t s
all around.
Another animal, Joy. It didn’t occur to me to see that long snout. Love the rhyme, too.
SNOUT would have been better than tongue, then to up the ante on the sibilants I could have used SNIFFS for roots. Thanks Linda.
Love how you are showing your revision process here, Joy! Fun to show my students, thanks!!
Ooooh, what a great take on this photo! Fun to imagine all the ants scurrying around, chased by the anteater’s tongue.
Oh, my gosh… someone else saw an anteater! 🙂 I always write mine before reading the others, so am pleasantly surprised to find that another person saw the same thing I did.
I like your rhyme and how you used the word “roots”.
I love the rhythmic simplicity of this, Joy. Fun to read aloud!
I had to stare at this a long time before any ideas came.
Pretty, but a hard one.
Here goes:
Collage
Cut and glue
blended colors,
lovely hue.
For swirl of drama,
black will do.
I like the rhythm of this, & the ‘art’ arrangement.
I saw that tissue paper collage, too, and LOVE what you have done with it, Patricia.
Patricia, I knew you would come through with rhyme and meter. Love it!
For one who had to struggle, you sure came up with a beauty! Love the abstract simplicity which is enhanced by your rhyme.
Love the rhymes and “swirl of drama”.
Thanks to all for your kind words. I am blown away by the variety of wonderful ideas that have been posted today. This is a great site.
Patricia, I love that “swirl of drama”!
I had to stare at this a long time before any ideas came.
Pretty, but a hard one.
Here goes:
Collage
Cut and glue
blended colors,
lovely hue.
For swirl of drama,
black will do.
I like the rhythm of this, & the ‘art’ arrangement.
I saw that tissue paper collage, too, and LOVE what you have done with it, Patricia.
Patricia, I knew you would come through with rhyme and meter. Love it!
For one who had to struggle, you sure came up with a beauty! Love the abstract simplicity which is enhanced by your rhyme.
Love the rhymes and “swirl of drama”.
Thanks to all for your kind words. I am blown away by the variety of wonderful ideas that have been posted today. This is a great site.
Patricia, I love that “swirl of drama”!
Oh, yes, a rooting anteater!! I see it, Joy and hello to you!
Oh, yes, a rooting anteater!! I see it, Joy and hello to you!
Red velvet glows
from darkest space;
royalty emerges from dark hole:
divine portal.
Cool SciFi twist! Love the “divine portal.”
Another new take on the picture ~ I love how different people see the same thing in many different ways. 🙂
“Divine portal” is my favorite part.
I love this velvety feel.
Oooh. Line 3 really grabs me. It has mystery and power. I can’t even come up with a meaning for this poem, but it sets such a mood…
Oh, magic: a castle, a queen, a cape of velvet.….transported to another land.…maybe through the wardrobe???? Whose to know?
Red velvet glows
from darkest space;
royalty emerges from dark hole:
divine portal.
Cool SciFi twist! Love the “divine portal.”
Another new take on the picture ~ I love how different people see the same thing in many different ways. 🙂
“Divine portal” is my favorite part.
I love this velvety feel.
Oooh. Line 3 really grabs me. It has mystery and power. I can’t even come up with a meaning for this poem, but it sets such a mood…
Oh, magic: a castle, a queen, a cape of velvet.….transported to another land.…maybe through the wardrobe???? Whose to know?
My eye immediately focused on the narrow funnel end on earth and the wide open above in the heavens.
A
time to
leave this earth
a time to be released -
raised hands in hallelujah.
Such a totally different view and I like it a lot, Donna. Beautiful. Raised hands in hallelujah, a beautiful ending to your poem and to life itself.
Thanks, Janet. I contemplated making the funnel shape the other way… but never got back to it. I did, however, obsess on the poem until I wrote more… posted it on my page to be done with it!
Wow! Another wonderfully original take on this prompt! Very effective on an emotional level, and I like how the structure of your poem is funnel-shaped as well.
I love your last line, too!
Wow-still a new idea, Donna. I didn’t notice ‘up’ at all. I like your stair steps!
Beautiful, Donna–and I like the concrete shape of your poem, which I’m thinking might have been centered, even though it didn’t translate that way? Anyway, it feels like a poem at peace.
My eye immediately focused on the narrow funnel end on earth and the wide open above in the heavens.
A
time to
leave this earth
a time to be released -
raised hands in hallelujah.
Such a totally different view and I like it a lot, Donna. Beautiful. Raised hands in hallelujah, a beautiful ending to your poem and to life itself.
Thanks, Janet. I contemplated making the funnel shape the other way… but never got back to it. I did, however, obsess on the poem until I wrote more… posted it on my page to be done with it!
Wow! Another wonderfully original take on this prompt! Very effective on an emotional level, and I like how the structure of your poem is funnel-shaped as well.
I love your last line, too!
Wow-still a new idea, Donna. I didn’t notice ‘up’ at all. I like your stair steps!
Beautiful, Donna–and I like the concrete shape of your poem, which I’m thinking might have been centered, even though it didn’t translate that way? Anyway, it feels like a poem at peace.
Nice Laura! The lines that my poem refers to are not as precise, but just as memorable.
ELEPHANT’S TRUNK
I may not say much
But give me a paintbrush
I’ll draw you 1000 words
© Michelle Heidenrich Barnes, all rights reserved.
Oh, Michelle, I love this. Really!! I can just picture those brush-wielding elephants merrily painting away expressing themselves. Don’t they have soulful eyes? When a small circus came to town when my son was young, my husband rode on an elephant with my son, sitting right on the head. No cell phones or a camera in hand, sadly. You brought this long-forgotten memory back, thanks.
I once rode on an elephant as well! It was truly an amazing experience for me. Glad I could help bring back that memory for you, Janet. 🙂
Love this!
Oh my, lots of elephant talk today, Michelle! I love the idea of the painting, this time in the mood for reds!
Thought you might enjoy this video of an elephant painting a picture of poppies.…
http://youtu.be/SNogdpHeuiE
Thanks so much for posting this Donna! I saw an elephant paint at an Elephant Rescue Refuge about an hour from where I live, but the results were far more abstract. This is incredible! I will definitely search out the poppy video too.
Whoops! First of all I didn’t think it would embed. Secondly, I had the wrong url copied, so didn’t get you to the correct one (though this one is good, too). I’m not going to embed the correct video! Just do a search on YouTube for elephant painting poppies and you will get it!
Oh how funny I hadn’t read this when I wrote mine 🙂 1000 words indeed.
Love this! Still thinking about One and Only Ivan…
It’s a good book to be thinking about! 🙂
Thanks, Michelle. I love the calmness of this poem. The stolid certainty, which seems to match an elephant quite well:>)
Nice Laura! The lines that my poem refers to are not as precise, but just as memorable.
ELEPHANT’S TRUNK
I may not say much
But give me a paintbrush
I’ll draw you 1000 words
© Michelle Heidenrich Barnes, all rights reserved.
Oh, Michelle, I love this. Really!! I can just picture those brush-wielding elephants merrily painting away expressing themselves. Don’t they have soulful eyes? When a small circus came to town when my son was young, my husband rode on an elephant with my son, sitting right on the head. No cell phones or a camera in hand, sadly. You brought this long-forgotten memory back, thanks.
I once rode on an elephant as well! It was truly an amazing experience for me. Glad I could help bring back that memory for you, Janet. 🙂
Love this!
Oh my, lots of elephant talk today, Michelle! I love the idea of the painting, this time in the mood for reds!
Thought you might enjoy this video of an elephant painting a picture of poppies.…
http://youtu.be/SNogdpHeuiE
Thanks so much for posting this Donna! I saw an elephant paint at an Elephant Rescue Refuge about an hour from where I live, but the results were far more abstract. This is incredible! I will definitely search out the poppy video too.
Whoops! First of all I didn’t think it would embed. Secondly, I had the wrong url copied, so didn’t get you to the correct one (though this one is good, too). I’m not going to embed the correct video! Just do a search on YouTube for elephant painting poppies and you will get it!
Oh how funny I hadn’t read this when I wrote mine 🙂 1000 words indeed.
Love this! Still thinking about One and Only Ivan…
It’s a good book to be thinking about! 🙂
Thanks, Michelle. I love the calmness of this poem. The stolid certainty, which seems to match an elephant quite well:>)
vulture’s beak–
ripping, gripping, bloodied hook:
road-kill cleanup begun.
Ack! I think this poem falls into the elite category of those that make me go “ewwwwww,” but I’m REALLY glad I read. Your imagery is freakin’ awesome, Buffy.
^ I agree! That second line gives me the chills.
A new idea! But gruesome, all that blood! And still funny-you packed so much into these lines, Buffy!
That sounds so funny while looking at your smiling face LOL.
I was reading a poem with kids the other day called Wild Wind, and part of it is whipping wind/ripping wind/please release your gripping wind, so it was funny to see a couple of those same words here in a poem that has nothing to do with wind but it based on a picture so much like a tornado (which is what Wild Wind is about). Anyway–I completely love that middle line. Bloodied hook–oh my god.
We gotta’ love these cleaners. Nature’s little helpers. It’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it, right??
I love your unique take on the picture. I can see it, all the blood and the beak!!!
vulture’s beak–
ripping, gripping, bloodied hook:
road-kill cleanup begun.
Ack! I think this poem falls into the elite category of those that make me go “ewwwwww,” but I’m REALLY glad I read. Your imagery is freakin’ awesome, Buffy.
^ I agree! That second line gives me the chills.
A new idea! But gruesome, all that blood! And still funny-you packed so much into these lines, Buffy!
That sounds so funny while looking at your smiling face LOL.
I was reading a poem with kids the other day called Wild Wind, and part of it is whipping wind/ripping wind/please release your gripping wind, so it was funny to see a couple of those same words here in a poem that has nothing to do with wind but it based on a picture so much like a tornado (which is what Wild Wind is about). Anyway–I completely love that middle line. Bloodied hook–oh my god.
We gotta’ love these cleaners. Nature’s little helpers. It’s a tough job, but someone’s gotta do it, right??
I love your unique take on the picture. I can see it, all the blood and the beak!!!
Neat poem, Laura! I especially like “Time stilled” and “precise lines”.
Immediately after seeing the picture, I thought of this:
ANTEATER
The ants go marching
one by one –
I gobble them up
with my long tongue.
Then I decided to come up with something else, since half of that poem is already a song, not my own words.
DOROTHY’S TWISTER
Ferocious funnel
rips home
from foundation:
How one brief
moment of film
created life-long
fear.
I really like the deeper meaning of Dorothy’s Twister. Especially in this day and age, when television is constantly bombarding us with images that perhaps are best left unseen.
You make me wonder how many did become fearful after that scene-love ‘ferocious funnel’!
Great twister poem. It is unfortunate how easily affected you can be by the media.
I liked your anteater. I thought of the ant’s song too, but decided not to go there–it was too easy. Well done on both poems.
Thanks, Janelle–hehe, I do love song parodies. On your second one, I love 1) the alliteration, and 2) how you made 15 words feel so long. The sounds really make you read slowly, and it echoes the theme of your poem. I even counted because I finished it and thought, “No way was that only 15 words!” Love that!
Neat poem, Laura! I especially like “Time stilled” and “precise lines”.
Immediately after seeing the picture, I thought of this:
ANTEATER
The ants go marching
one by one –
I gobble them up
with my long tongue.
Then I decided to come up with something else, since half of that poem is already a song, not my own words.
DOROTHY’S TWISTER
Ferocious funnel
rips home
from foundation:
How one brief
moment of film
created life-long
fear.
I really like the deeper meaning of Dorothy’s Twister. Especially in this day and age, when television is constantly bombarding us with images that perhaps are best left unseen.
You make me wonder how many did become fearful after that scene-love ‘ferocious funnel’!
Great twister poem. It is unfortunate how easily affected you can be by the media.
I liked your anteater. I thought of the ant’s song too, but decided not to go there–it was too easy. Well done on both poems.
Thanks, Janelle–hehe, I do love song parodies. On your second one, I love 1) the alliteration, and 2) how you made 15 words feel so long. The sounds really make you read slowly, and it echoes the theme of your poem. I even counted because I finished it and thought, “No way was that only 15 words!” Love that!
He yearned to paint
and no one had yet told him that
Elephants don’t paint
(Nevermind they actually do paint, go elephants!)
Yeah, see the embedded video of an elephant painting up a ways!
Catherine — reminds me of the classic “Why did the elephant paint her toenails red? So she could hide in the strawberry patch” 😉
Oh I like that, Cathy.
How funny Catherine! Great minds think alike. 🙂
Hah! Love that surprise of the last line. I heard a piece on Writer’s Almanac a couple of years ago about painting elephants. I had no idea!
I bet your elephants look great, Catherine! Funny.….it isn’t it interesting how they do. I love their eyes as I said above…wouldn’t it be interesting to find out what they are really thinking. BTW I gave a copy of the animal book to my friend’s grandson and she reports that it is a favorite. He loves to tell you what they “say”!!!
He yearned to paint
and no one had yet told him that
Elephants don’t paint
(Nevermind they actually do paint, go elephants!)
Yeah, see the embedded video of an elephant painting up a ways!
Catherine — reminds me of the classic “Why did the elephant paint her toenails red? So she could hide in the strawberry patch” 😉
Oh I like that, Cathy.
How funny Catherine! Great minds think alike. 🙂
Hah! Love that surprise of the last line. I heard a piece on Writer’s Almanac a couple of years ago about painting elephants. I had no idea!
I bet your elephants look great, Catherine! Funny.….it isn’t it interesting how they do. I love their eyes as I said above…wouldn’t it be interesting to find out what they are really thinking. BTW I gave a copy of the animal book to my friend’s grandson and she reports that it is a favorite. He loves to tell you what they “say”!!!
With 160 comments so far, I don’t have time to read them all…but I do like the one you started us off with, Laura! Here’s mine:
Amethyst Sky
It carried her away just as before -
but Dorothy knew
she wasn’t in Oz anymore.
- ? 2013, Matt Forrest Esenwine
Hi Matt,
We have similar titles, but I see an elephant’s trunk. I want to know where Dorothy has landed this time!!! And I hope Glinda is still able to help!! And of course she must get back to Kansas!!!
With 160 comments so far, I don’t have time to read them all…but I do like the one you started us off with, Laura! Here’s mine:
Amethyst Sky
It carried her away just as before -
but Dorothy knew
she wasn’t in Oz anymore.
- ? 2013, Matt Forrest Esenwine
Hi Matt,
We have similar titles, but I see an elephant’s trunk. I want to know where Dorothy has landed this time!!! And I hope Glinda is still able to help!! And of course she must get back to Kansas!!!
Here I sit quietly
With troubled mind
Trembling with fear
No answers
Can I find !
- Anne McKenna
I also read the first poem which is in stark contrast to mine. I guess it all depend where your mindset is at the time of looking at each picture.
(This picture is almost exactly what I see when I close my eyes to think or not think in this case)
Here I sit quietly
With troubled mind
Trembling with fear
No answers
Can I find !
- Anne McKenna
I also read the first poem which is in stark contrast to mine. I guess it all depend where your mindset is at the time of looking at each picture.
(This picture is almost exactly what I see when I close my eyes to think or not think in this case)
Oh, closing your eyes and seeing red and the funnel. The lack of words, the white page, a total blank, yet in your mind fire and motion. Harness the power to write and find the muse. Your poems brings us a lot to think about, Anne.
Thank you Janet I never thought of it like that. I do have a story under way maybe I am just over thinking. I will take you advice and see where it takes me.
Oh, closing your eyes and seeing red and the funnel. The lack of words, the white page, a total blank, yet in your mind fire and motion. Harness the power to write and find the muse. Your poems brings us a lot to think about, Anne.
Thank you Janet I never thought of it like that. I do have a story under way maybe I am just over thinking. I will take you advice and see where it takes me.
Couldn’t decide which one, though I love the double meaning of “bittersweet.”
FUNNEL OF FURY
Funnel of fury
Humanity cries ?
Shards of wreckage
Under mulberry skies.
FUNNEL OF FURY #2
Funnel of fury
Humanity cries,
Shards of wreckage ?
Bittersweet skies.
© Charles Waters 2013 all rights reserved.
Couldn’t decide which one, though I love the double meaning of “bittersweet.”
FUNNEL OF FURY
Funnel of fury
Humanity cries ?
Shards of wreckage
Under mulberry skies.
FUNNEL OF FURY #2
Funnel of fury
Humanity cries,
Shards of wreckage ?
Bittersweet skies.
© Charles Waters 2013 all rights reserved.