Photo: Laura Salas
Wake up your poetry brains with 15 Words or Less (guidelines here)!
On our plane ride home from Florida Sunday, I was behind this girl wearing her doll in a backpack. I was half amazed and half horrified. How cool! How creepy!?Here are?3 things this photo makes me think of:
1)??a sarcophagus
2)??Sleeping Beauty
3)? space travelers put in cryogenic sleep until they get where they’re going
And here’s my?first draft. Confession: This is a week where I’m fascinated by the image, but completely struggling to quickly come up with a draft of anything!
I’m Frozen
in time
in space
in a capsule
My breath
hovers
above
the galaxy
–Laura Purdie Salas, all rights reserved
Now it’s your turn! Have fun and stick to 15 WORDS OR LESS!??(Title doesn’t count toward word count:>)?
Children’s writers: Since my blog now targets educators, my annual How Much Money Does a Writer Make post, which breaks down my income, will be in my March e‑newsletter next week, NOT on my blog. If you’re interested, please subscribe using the link here ?and choose A Writer Can Be.… You can unsubscribe at any time if you don’t want to continue receiving the newsletter. Cheers:>)
108 Responses
Laura, I lifted a line from your poem and was surprised how oppressive my result was.
My breath
silenced by your words
gasps for release, air
from this cave of distrust.
–Margaret Simon
Margaret, I also had a “gasping for air” moment.
I like that phrase, “cave of distrust.”
Cave of distrust–ooh, that is marvelous, Margaret! Isn’t it funny what comes out sometimes?
Laura, I lifted a line from your poem and was surprised how oppressive my result was.
My breath
silenced by your words
gasps for release, air
from this cave of distrust.
–Margaret Simon
Margaret, I also had a “gasping for air” moment.
I like that phrase, “cave of distrust.”
Cave of distrust–ooh, that is marvelous, Margaret! Isn’t it funny what comes out sometimes?
Love “my breath hovers above the galaxy” Laura!
Perfection’s Price
You keep me preserved
pristine and pure,
but I long to be marked
by love.
Andria W. Rosenbaum/ all rights reserved
Andria, I understand being able to “play” with a doll as opposed to a “for show” one.
Yes, so many of those dolls are just for “looks.” I like a doll that doesn’t need to be treated so carefully.
Thanks, Andria! I love your poem. Great alliteration, too. My “On the Shelf and Under the Bed,” in BOOKSPEAK, is about this same thing. I have a great time talking with upper elementary students about how the things we love best are often worn out and highly imperfect, and that that’s a good thing.
Love “my breath hovers above the galaxy” Laura!
Perfection’s Price
You keep me preserved
pristine and pure,
but I long to be marked
by love.
Andria W. Rosenbaum/ all rights reserved
Andria, I understand being able to “play” with a doll as opposed to a “for show” one.
Yes, so many of those dolls are just for “looks.” I like a doll that doesn’t need to be treated so carefully.
Thanks, Andria! I love your poem. Great alliteration, too. My “On the Shelf and Under the Bed,” in BOOKSPEAK, is about this same thing. I have a great time talking with upper elementary students about how the things we love best are often worn out and highly imperfect, and that that’s a good thing.
Looking out
through a window of love,
carried and cared for
by someone above.
Thank goodness for the window, and possibly some air!
I like your idea of “window of love.”
Love this! Makes me picture a dog in a carrier–a happy dog:>)
Looking out
through a window of love,
carried and cared for
by someone above.
Thank goodness for the window, and possibly some air!
I like your idea of “window of love.”
Love this! Makes me picture a dog in a carrier–a happy dog:>)
ADVENTURE
On an adventure
My girl leaves a little window
So I watch her shadow dance
I have an american girl doll, so I thought this was cute 🙂
Amelia, coming from an era of actually playing with dolls and treating them as human babies, there is a real need for the window.
Watching your child through a window resonates with me. I like your idea.
Aw, I like how friendly this is, and that the doll watches her girl’s shadow. That’s an awesome detail, since she’s facing away from her girl. Very clever!
I like the use of shadow
ADVENTURE
On an adventure
My girl leaves a little window
So I watch her shadow dance
I have an american girl doll, so I thought this was cute 🙂
Amelia, coming from an era of actually playing with dolls and treating them as human babies, there is a real need for the window.
Watching your child through a window resonates with me. I like your idea.
Aw, I like how friendly this is, and that the doll watches her girl’s shadow. That’s an awesome detail, since she’s facing away from her girl. Very clever!
I like the use of shadow
Laura, I like your idea that the picture inspired. However, all I could see was a doll in a back pack. I have two grand daughters who live close to Boston. Last fall, we went with them to an American Girl Doll Store. What an experience! Dozens of little girls, some with a doll pack on their back, all of them so excited, wanting this or that to go with their doll. Big price tags, too!
American Girl Doll Store
Girls with dolls
crowd the store,
look with wonder
wanting more.
Grandpa eyes
the door.
Pat, experience similar to the “build-a-bear” stores.
Ha. Love the grandpa!
I like the last line
Yeah, the American Doll empire is amazing. At the Chicago one, they have a restaurant where you eat with your doll. When we visit Chicago, we see those distinctive American Girl bags all over the Mile, clutched by excited little girls:>) Love Grandpa here, eying the door. Ha!
Laura, I like your idea that the picture inspired. However, all I could see was a doll in a back pack. I have two grand daughters who live close to Boston. Last fall, we went with them to an American Girl Doll Store. What an experience! Dozens of little girls, some with a doll pack on their back, all of them so excited, wanting this or that to go with their doll. Big price tags, too!
American Girl Doll Store
Girls with dolls
crowd the store,
look with wonder
wanting more.
Grandpa eyes
the door.
Pat, experience similar to the “build-a-bear” stores.
Ha. Love the grandpa!
I like the last line
Yeah, the American Doll empire is amazing. At the Chicago one, they have a restaurant where you eat with your doll. When we visit Chicago, we see those distinctive American Girl bags all over the Mile, clutched by excited little girls:>) Love Grandpa here, eying the door. Ha!
One never knows when a photo op will force the electronics into action. Good shot and first thoughts are endless.
Doll Speak
“Overhead be full
so I ride below;
lady across the aisle
loves me, I know.”
Cute one, Martha. I like the voice of the doll.
I felt stalkery trying to take a pic on the plane without anyone noticing. And your poem game me a great laugh!
One never knows when a photo op will force the electronics into action. Good shot and first thoughts are endless.
Doll Speak
“Overhead be full
so I ride below;
lady across the aisle
loves me, I know.”
Cute one, Martha. I like the voice of the doll.
I felt stalkery trying to take a pic on the plane without anyone noticing. And your poem game me a great laugh!
Glass Elevator
Scaling the hotel’s
facade I’m sickened
and horrified–some
creatures clearly
aren’t made to fly.
Diane Mayr, all rights reserved
Diane, I’m happy the doll is out of the plane. 😉
Interesting. You equated the doll pack to one of those outside glass elevators.
I like the comparison.
Ha! Yes–that didn’t occur to me, but what a great connection:>) I can’t stand right next to the exterior glass when I’m in a glass elevator. You know, it could break at any moment!
Glass Elevator
Scaling the hotel’s
facade I’m sickened
and horrified–some
creatures clearly
aren’t made to fly.
Diane Mayr, all rights reserved
Diane, I’m happy the doll is out of the plane. 😉
Interesting. You equated the doll pack to one of those outside glass elevators.
I like the comparison.
Ha! Yes–that didn’t occur to me, but what a great connection:>) I can’t stand right next to the exterior glass when I’m in a glass elevator. You know, it could break at any moment!
doll
staring dusty
on a shelf
why does she
remind me
of myself?
?Kate Coombs
One of those American Girl dolls is called “Just Like Me.” Must be common to want the doll to look like the owner. But your idea goes deeper, I realize.
This is either sad or creepy. I feel like the kid is either an observer of her own life, which makes me sad. Or she’s in a SF/fantasy situation with a creepy twin/clone. Oooohhh. (I do know about the My Twin dolls or whatever, but this poem had a different feel to me:>) Love “dusty” in there.
Kate, in my young eyes, my dolls always looked like me. It’s a shame when they are put aside and become “dusty.” I like the way you share your inner self.
doll
staring dusty
on a shelf
why does she
remind me
of myself?
?Kate Coombs
One of those American Girl dolls is called “Just Like Me.” Must be common to want the doll to look like the owner. But your idea goes deeper, I realize.
This is either sad or creepy. I feel like the kid is either an observer of her own life, which makes me sad. Or she’s in a SF/fantasy situation with a creepy twin/clone. Oooohhh. (I do know about the My Twin dolls or whatever, but this poem had a different feel to me:>) Love “dusty” in there.
Kate, in my young eyes, my dolls always looked like me. It’s a shame when they are put aside and become “dusty.” I like the way you share your inner self.
When I was young I love to hear my friend Ann tall stories of all the places she had gone to viset her was so fun bubble gum meachine cookies candy and trinkets on her walls from places she had been I miss her so much
My Friend Ann
Stories weighting
Cross country
On glass bottom boats
Bubble gum
candy hearts and kisses
Best friends
I love the concrete details here, Jessica–all those little details that friends share–and then that intriguing glass-bottom boat, that brings in the exotic element. Nice!
Jessica, friends can be like bubble gum and candy hearts, forever.
When I was young I love to hear my friend Ann tall stories of all the places she had gone to viset her was so fun bubble gum meachine cookies candy and trinkets on her walls from places she had been I miss her so much
My Friend Ann
Stories weighting
Cross country
On glass bottom boats
Bubble gum
candy hearts and kisses
Best friends
I love the concrete details here, Jessica–all those little details that friends share–and then that intriguing glass-bottom boat, that brings in the exotic element. Nice!
Jessica, friends can be like bubble gum and candy hearts, forever.
You’re right, Laura, cool AND creepy! Here’s something from the doll’s pov:
Be My Friend?
Through my window
I can see
A little girl
To play with me.
I like the simple, yearning voice here, Jane.
And we can hope she did indeed play with the doll, maybe even during flight.
You’re right, Laura, cool AND creepy! Here’s something from the doll’s pov:
Be My Friend?
Through my window
I can see
A little girl
To play with me.
I like the simple, yearning voice here, Jane.
And we can hope she did indeed play with the doll, maybe even during flight.
BACKPACK KEWPIE
Dolly?s cast in cargo ?
Its fate is on the shoulders of
Human counterpart.
© Charles Waters 2014 all rights reserved.
Ah yes, the Kewpie dolls and the dreaded cargo holds, where even the luggage cringes. I really enjoy the male version on 15WOL.
I really like the use of “cast” here. Brings so many associations: molded, actor, thrown away…
BACKPACK KEWPIE
Dolly?s cast in cargo ?
Its fate is on the shoulders of
Human counterpart.
© Charles Waters 2014 all rights reserved.
Ah yes, the Kewpie dolls and the dreaded cargo holds, where even the luggage cringes. I really enjoy the male version on 15WOL.
I really like the use of “cast” here. Brings so many associations: molded, actor, thrown away…
The breath hovering, needy, rather scary as you said, Laura. All I could think was being ‘in the box’.
Doll, like daughter-
pretty presentation.
Wrapped up, trapped up,
females wishing more
of life?s liberation.
Linda Baie ?All Rights Reserved
Linda, fifteen words laden with power and stated eloquently.
Oh, I love that third line! Wow.
The breath hovering, needy, rather scary as you said, Laura. All I could think was being ‘in the box’.
Doll, like daughter-
pretty presentation.
Wrapped up, trapped up,
females wishing more
of life?s liberation.
Linda Baie ?All Rights Reserved
Linda, fifteen words laden with power and stated eloquently.
Oh, I love that third line! Wow.
small hands snip and stitch
fabric, ribbon, and sparkles:
doll dress designers
Lovely–makes me think of kids AND my mother-in-law at the same time:>)
small hands snip and stitch
fabric, ribbon, and sparkles:
doll dress designers
Lovely–makes me think of kids AND my mother-in-law at the same time:>)
Can’t say that I like the face peeking out the back.
“My beautiful assistant
Will be sawn in two!”
Announced Magnifico.
“Ewww. Hand me the glue!”
Yeah, neither do I, really. Ha–love the funny story here!
Can’t say that I like the face peeking out the back.
“My beautiful assistant
Will be sawn in two!”
Announced Magnifico.
“Ewww. Hand me the glue!”
Yeah, neither do I, really. Ha–love the funny story here!
Regrets
Protected,
unaffected,
she exists outside
a world she rejected
and wishes
she chose
to live.
~~Barbara J. Turner
We do wall ourselves off, don’t we…
Regrets
Protected,
unaffected,
she exists outside
a world she rejected
and wishes
she chose
to live.
~~Barbara J. Turner
We do wall ourselves off, don’t we…
Destination unknown
Wherever it be I go alone
Oh mummy please !
Not on my own.
Love the use of “mummy”! Hehehe
Destination unknown
Wherever it be I go alone
Oh mummy please !
Not on my own.
Love the use of “mummy”! Hehehe
What wonderful interpretations of Laura’s photo, everyone! Thank you!
What wonderful interpretations of Laura’s photo, everyone! Thank you!