I’m a fairly confident writer. But even though I know I can write, I never know if any particular person will like it. So, when I turn in a piece of writing to an editor, I hold my breath. It’s like turning in a school assignment and waiting for a grade. I just turned in a picture book manuscript that would be part of a reading collection. I proposed the idea and structure, got approval, and wrote it. When I started the manuscript, I was intrigued by my topic. By the time I turned it in, though, I had fallen a little bit (okay, head-over-heels) in love with it. I thought, “What if the editor wants to change everything? Or, worse, says it’s not even worth revising?” I don’t have those thoughts in a big way, but they are a little bee bzzzz-ing in my ear as I wait for an editor’s response. Luckily, I got enthusiastic feedback from the editor, and I made the minor changes she suggested. Now I’ve turned it in again. I’m waiting again. Trying to ignore the bzzzz again. Because now the manuscript is off to the head honchos–the decision-makers. So even if my editor and I love it, well, they might not. It’s kind of like being in 4th grade all over again.
8 Responses
Thank you for voicing what we all feel — oooh, that self-doubt.
Luckily, we’re usually too busy to hear that little doubtful voice. Because if we listened too hard, we might never send anything out!
I don’t want to even think about being in 4th grade again, much less feel that way. Best of luck to you!
Hey, it’s better than junior high!
So what you’re saying is, even after I get 40 or 50 books published, I’ll STILL end up full of self-doubt about my work? Good grief! And here I was hoping it’d get easier the more I did it!
Seriously, though, I wish you the best with the ms…and thanks for letting those of us with just a few titles to our name know we’re not alone!
Hehe–well, not all the time or anything! But there’s always that twinge when you turn something in, you know? YOU like it, but will the editor? And especially if you’ve taken creative risks…
Yes, I know what you mean. last year, I wrote a poetry collection/picture book I’m extremely proud of, but I don’t think anyone’s going to pick it up…which makes me wonder what to do!
Fingers crossed for you, Laura!