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?Photo: Laura Salas
Wake up your poetry brains with 15 Words or Less (guidelines are here)!
I missed you guys! Glad to be back this week! Three things this photo makes me think of:
1) Rockets
2) Umbrellas
3) Post-hurricane destruction
And here’s my first draft!
Waterproof? Yes. Windproof? No.
Umbrella is battered
Umbrella is tattered
Wind gnashed its teeth
and the fabric wings scattered
–Laura Purdie Salas, all rights reserved
Now it’s your turn! Have fun? and stick to? 15 WORDS OR LESS!??(Title doesn’t count toward word count:>)?
178 Responses
Clothes on line
Would never dry
Almost enough
to make me cry
Too dusty anyway
- Anne McKenna
Oh, THAT’s the thing that was on the tip of my brain but wouldn’t come to me. It’s those metal clothesline thingies! So glad you wrote this, Anne:>) Love the aside of that last line.
My son was walking by saw the Pic and said clothesline which is what I was thinking anyway so I thought here goes. Thank you. Always write my others too late for any comment 🙂
I hate to admit it, but I remember those metal clothes line too ;-).. Nice take!
I thought of the clotheslines, too, and think of the dust in this place. Nice to add that last line.
Been there, done that. Great poem!
I love the sigh in this.Beautiful!
Clothes on line
Would never dry
Almost enough
to make me cry
Too dusty anyway
- Anne McKenna
Oh, THAT’s the thing that was on the tip of my brain but wouldn’t come to me. It’s those metal clothesline thingies! So glad you wrote this, Anne:>) Love the aside of that last line.
My son was walking by saw the Pic and said clothesline which is what I was thinking anyway so I thought here goes. Thank you. Always write my others too late for any comment 🙂
I hate to admit it, but I remember those metal clothes line too ;-).. Nice take!
I thought of the clotheslines, too, and think of the dust in this place. Nice to add that last line.
Been there, done that. Great poem!
I love the sigh in this.Beautiful!
Stork?
Stand on one leg
Raise my white head
stretch my arms out
Wait, no feathers???
I love your “fabric wings”, Ms. Salas! Great picture!
A featherless stork, I see it now!
Didn’t see that bird until now-surprise!
Aww… poor bird! I can see it, too, now.
Stork?
Stand on one leg
Raise my white head
stretch my arms out
Wait, no feathers???
I love your “fabric wings”, Ms. Salas! Great picture!
A featherless stork, I see it now!
Didn’t see that bird until now-surprise!
Aww… poor bird! I can see it, too, now.
My favorite part is fabric wings. I always love a good metaphor.
Deserted
That last strong gust
left my sail in the dust.
Alone, bare
my skeleton may rust.
Thanks, Margaret! Oooh, I really feel that abandonment in those last two lines. Nicely done.
You captured the isolation well, Margaret!
I like your strong images and rhymes.
My favorite part is fabric wings. I always love a good metaphor.
Deserted
That last strong gust
left my sail in the dust.
Alone, bare
my skeleton may rust.
Thanks, Margaret! Oooh, I really feel that abandonment in those last two lines. Nicely done.
You captured the isolation well, Margaret!
I like your strong images and rhymes.
With a few additions I see kiddie rides.
Beach Carousels
Little cars here
a few planes there
kids buckled in
giggles in the air.
Fun! I love the idea of giggles in air! (I added the s to plane and deleted your other comment, btw)
Laura, thanks for the correction. I saw it the moment I hit “send.”
Love the giggles in the air! That’s what really makes a ride fun. Sweet!
My imagination took me to a carnival or fair, too. Love how you gave the picture life.
I, too, love “giggles in the air”. 🙂
I agree with the other comments, Martha. Kids giggling on rides.
I like your take on this.
With a few additions I see kiddie rides.
Beach Carousels
Little cars here
a few planes there
kids buckled in
giggles in the air.
Fun! I love the idea of giggles in air! (I added the s to plane and deleted your other comment, btw)
Laura, thanks for the correction. I saw it the moment I hit “send.”
Love the giggles in the air! That’s what really makes a ride fun. Sweet!
My imagination took me to a carnival or fair, too. Love how you gave the picture life.
I, too, love “giggles in the air”. 🙂
I agree with the other comments, Martha. Kids giggling on rides.
I like your take on this.
This picture brought two completely different poems to mind:
Hurricane Havoc
Trees stripped bare
leaf out again
in time for fall.
The Aliens have Landed
We traveled so far -
open our arms
to welcome you.
Where is everyone?
Ellie, I love how different these are. Yet both have a bit of melancholy yearning to them. Nice.
Both different, but show such imagination. I wondered if they were somehow antennae?
Both leave me feeling sad. I especially like your first poem!
This picture brought two completely different poems to mind:
Hurricane Havoc
Trees stripped bare
leaf out again
in time for fall.
The Aliens have Landed
We traveled so far -
open our arms
to welcome you.
Where is everyone?
Ellie, I love how different these are. Yet both have a bit of melancholy yearning to them. Nice.
Both different, but show such imagination. I wondered if they were somehow antennae?
Both leave me feeling sad. I especially like your first poem!
adjust the antenna
Left or right
To bring our prime time show
In sight.
Yes! A tv antenna–you guys rock. This is such a simple image, but it’s already been compared to 5 different concrete things. Makes me think this would be a good image to use in a poetry writing workshop with kids…
I wrote it above too, but thought of antennae, but seeking aliens somehow. Love your thoughts of tv coverage.
Yep, I can see that!
adjust the antenna
Left or right
To bring our prime time show
In sight.
Yes! A tv antenna–you guys rock. This is such a simple image, but it’s already been compared to 5 different concrete things. Makes me think this would be a good image to use in a poetry writing workshop with kids…
I wrote it above too, but thought of antennae, but seeking aliens somehow. Love your thoughts of tv coverage.
Yep, I can see that!
Loved your rhymer, Laura!
I’m showing my age with this one- but it so reminded me of the Maypole at my elementary school that we loved to play on. Needless to say, it is not there anymore!
MAYPOLE
Someone is pulling
you low and slow.
Then faster, higher, faster, higher-
Don’t Let Go!!
Love that, Cindyb! I can see it:>) (I thought line 3 would evoke even more speed without the commas.)
Ah! I wrestled with how to convey speed. Excellent suggestion! Thanks!
Once on a trip, we found an old playground with one of those, the kids loved it! You caught the excitement so well!
Fun poem! I saw something similar.…
Yes. My first thought was of a Maypole, too. But I couldn’t get a poem out of it.
You did a good job with your idea. I danced the Maypole dance too, many decades ago.:)
Loved your rhymer, Laura!
I’m showing my age with this one- but it so reminded me of the Maypole at my elementary school that we loved to play on. Needless to say, it is not there anymore!
MAYPOLE
Someone is pulling
you low and slow.
Then faster, higher, faster, higher-
Don’t Let Go!!
Love that, Cindyb! I can see it:>) (I thought line 3 would evoke even more speed without the commas.)
Ah! I wrestled with how to convey speed. Excellent suggestion! Thanks!
Once on a trip, we found an old playground with one of those, the kids loved it! You caught the excitement so well!
Fun poem! I saw something similar.…
Yes. My first thought was of a Maypole, too. But I couldn’t get a poem out of it.
You did a good job with your idea. I danced the Maypole dance too, many decades ago.:)
COMPANY
Stripped of my striped top,
birds rest,
build a nest,
dress me in
their feathers.
Andria W. Rosenbaum, all rights reserved
Love that idea of feathers added later.
Oh, I love the ending!
Lovely! I see the umbrella canvas (even though it’s gone), the birds, the nest, the feathers…so many concrete images. Yay!
I love “dress me in/their feathers.”
COMPANY
Stripped of my striped top,
birds rest,
build a nest,
dress me in
their feathers.
Andria W. Rosenbaum, all rights reserved
Love that idea of feathers added later.
Oh, I love the ending!
Lovely! I see the umbrella canvas (even though it’s gone), the birds, the nest, the feathers…so many concrete images. Yay!
I love “dress me in/their feathers.”
Laura,
Love the rhyme, rhythm and “fabric wings”. I also like how you set blame firmly on the wind.
Yup, all the wind’s fault:>)
Laura,
Love the rhyme, rhythm and “fabric wings”. I also like how you set blame firmly on the wind.
Yup, all the wind’s fault:>)
Rough rocks become
smooth silver shafts
folded into forms?
oh, those human hands!
?Kate Coombs
You’ve given a compliment to humans’ innovation for sure here. Love seeing the idea of going to the ‘roots’.
I love your take on it!
WOw–somehow you used alliteration in EVERY single short line, and yet it feels organic, not forced. Brava!
Rough rocks become
smooth silver shafts
folded into forms?
oh, those human hands!
?Kate Coombs
You’ve given a compliment to humans’ innovation for sure here. Love seeing the idea of going to the ‘roots’.
I love your take on it!
WOw–somehow you used alliteration in EVERY single short line, and yet it feels organic, not forced. Brava!
Wow, Kate! Talk about a whole different take. Wonderful how you transport the reader back to the origin of the material used to make the umbrella.
Wow, Kate! Talk about a whole different take. Wonderful how you transport the reader back to the origin of the material used to make the umbrella.
Rushing round
gaze at ground
cinnamon doughnut swirl
Jeanne Poland
Jeanne, I don’t know if I’m interpreting this the way you meant it, but when I spin and then stop, and the ground seems to spin in circles all around me, I can totally see how this would look like (and remind me of, since I have a huge sweet tooth), a cinnamon swirl!
Laura
You bit into it.
Jeanne
So neat to imagine what the place is like from the air, swirl! Terrific!
I think I’m going to get hungry whenever I spin around from now on. 😉
Rushing round
gaze at ground
cinnamon doughnut swirl
Jeanne Poland
Jeanne, I don’t know if I’m interpreting this the way you meant it, but when I spin and then stop, and the ground seems to spin in circles all around me, I can totally see how this would look like (and remind me of, since I have a huge sweet tooth), a cinnamon swirl!
Laura
You bit into it.
Jeanne
So neat to imagine what the place is like from the air, swirl! Terrific!
I think I’m going to get hungry whenever I spin around from now on. 😉
After Halloween
Skeletal
remains of summer.
Ghostly
wail of the wind.
Spectral
hands of ice nudging
Winter.
Diane Mayr, all rights reserved
I saw abandonment too, Diane, love that you included the wind which must be there in full force!
I love all of your Halloween-ish words, and especially like “Skeletal/remains of summer.”
Oooooooo. This is a keeper! I love the Skeletal/remains of summer, especially. Tomorrow, I’m featuring an old anthology of poems about ice, and this would fit in so wonderfully in that anthology…
After Halloween
Skeletal
remains of summer.
Ghostly
wail of the wind.
Spectral
hands of ice nudging
Winter.
Diane Mayr, all rights reserved
I saw abandonment too, Diane, love that you included the wind which must be there in full force!
I love all of your Halloween-ish words, and especially like “Skeletal/remains of summer.”
Oooooooo. This is a keeper! I love the Skeletal/remains of summer, especially. Tomorrow, I’m featuring an old anthology of poems about ice, and this would fit in so wonderfully in that anthology…
Laura, I like those fabric wings scattering-they would on this windy plain!
Here’s what I saw:
Summer goodbyes–
still remembering the fair!
(Twinkies, merry-go-rounds,
music blares.)
Sad there?s nothing,
nothing there.
Linda Baie?All Rights Reserved
I like the meloncholy feel to this, and the repetition of “nothing”.
I agree about the repetition. You did a good job of getting that feeling across.
Love the specifics you included about the fair–they make me see/hear it!
Laura, I like those fabric wings scattering-they would on this windy plain!
Here’s what I saw:
Summer goodbyes–
still remembering the fair!
(Twinkies, merry-go-rounds,
music blares.)
Sad there?s nothing,
nothing there.
Linda Baie?All Rights Reserved
I like the meloncholy feel to this, and the repetition of “nothing”.
I agree about the repetition. You did a good job of getting that feeling across.
Love the specifics you included about the fair–they make me see/hear it!
Summer packed away:
A lone gull
patrols the beach
riding a carousel without horses.
I really like the image of the gull on the “carousel”.
I like the feeling your poem portrays. Empty beaches, summer over.
I imagined that feeling, too Buffy. I like the ‘carousel without horses’-always lonely to see, too.
Wow! Great images here. And I love the choice of “patrols.”
I love “riding a carousel without horses.” I can see it perfectly.
Summer packed away:
A lone gull
patrols the beach
riding a carousel without horses.
I really like the image of the gull on the “carousel”.
I like the feeling your poem portrays. Empty beaches, summer over.
I imagined that feeling, too Buffy. I like the ‘carousel without horses’-always lonely to see, too.
Wow! Great images here. And I love the choice of “patrols.”
I love “riding a carousel without horses.” I can see it perfectly.
Fun poem, Laura! I especially like your title and the last two lines.
When I first saw the thumbnail of the photo on Facebook, I didn’t realize it was an umbrella. It looked like an old fashioned merry-go-round, like the one my grandparents had on their farm when I was growing up. (Hopefully this link will work… it’s a picture of it last year, with my sons riding on it: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10152019216455515&set=a.10152019214410515.888189.574540514&type=3&theater)
MERRY-GO-ROUND MEMORIES
spinning and spinning,
grinning and grinning,
faster and faster,
whizzing through air?
nothing can compare.
Cool, Janelle! I’ve never seen one of those! Love the extra space before that last line to bring it home.
Fun poem, Laura! I especially like your title and the last two lines.
When I first saw the thumbnail of the photo on Facebook, I didn’t realize it was an umbrella. It looked like an old fashioned merry-go-round, like the one my grandparents had on their farm when I was growing up. (Hopefully this link will work… it’s a picture of it last year, with my sons riding on it: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10152019216455515&set=a.10152019214410515.888189.574540514&type=3&theater)
MERRY-GO-ROUND MEMORIES
spinning and spinning,
grinning and grinning,
faster and faster,
whizzing through air?
nothing can compare.
Cool, Janelle! I’ve never seen one of those! Love the extra space before that last line to bring it home.
For some reason this picture made me think of watching an elephant pulling the ropes to raise the canvas for the circus tent. We stood and watched, fascinated with the sight. Hard to describe in only 15 words.
Circus
Watch the elephant
as he pops up the tent.
Smell aroma
of a sawdust scent.
Great sensory stuff here! You’re right…complex idea. Maybe you could replace “Smell aroma of” with something that adds new info, since sawdust scent perfectly gives us that aroma? It’s fun puttering around with these sometimes. I’m amazed at how much CAN be said in 15 words!
Yes! Thank you. Love your suggestion. I’m blank right now, but interested in working with this later. Perhaps a longer poem will come.
And it was just a thought. You should totally ignore it if it doesn’t resonate with you–or if you don’t want to put more than 3 minutes into the 15WOL poem. I rarely do:>)
For some reason this picture made me think of watching an elephant pulling the ropes to raise the canvas for the circus tent. We stood and watched, fascinated with the sight. Hard to describe in only 15 words.
Circus
Watch the elephant
as he pops up the tent.
Smell aroma
of a sawdust scent.
Great sensory stuff here! You’re right…complex idea. Maybe you could replace “Smell aroma of” with something that adds new info, since sawdust scent perfectly gives us that aroma? It’s fun puttering around with these sometimes. I’m amazed at how much CAN be said in 15 words!
Yes! Thank you. Love your suggestion. I’m blank right now, but interested in working with this later. Perhaps a longer poem will come.
And it was just a thought. You should totally ignore it if it doesn’t resonate with you–or if you don’t want to put more than 3 minutes into the 15WOL poem. I rarely do:>)
The Dandelion Seed
Scared of flight
until the wind whispers,
“come fly with me for the day.”
Laura E. Adams, All Rights Reserved
The Dandelion Seed
Scared of flight
until the wind whispers,
“come fly with me for the day.”
Laura E. Adams, All Rights Reserved
Love the structure of this poem, Diane. Those one word lines are fun to read alone!
Love the structure of this poem, Diane. Those one word lines are fun to read alone!
The Dandelion Seed
Scared of flight
until the wind whispers,
“come fly with me for the day.”
Love the fear you’ve given it!
The Dandelion Seed
Scared of flight
until the wind whispers,
“come fly with me for the day.”
Love the fear you’ve given it!
The Wind
snatches fabric
and flesh,
pockets them
and flies,
leaving you
the bones.
It’s been a gloomy week!
Well, at least gloom can result in a visceral poem!
Hi Liz!
I love the character you give to the wind. Snatches, pockets and especially–leaving you the bones.
Hope you are well on your way to having a better weekend.
The Wind
snatches fabric
and flesh,
pockets them
and flies,
leaving you
the bones.
It’s been a gloomy week!
Well, at least gloom can result in a visceral poem!
Hi Liz!
I love the character you give to the wind. Snatches, pockets and especially–leaving you the bones.
Hope you are well on your way to having a better weekend.
After Summer
She poses
coquettishly
but the pretty is gone.
All that remains
are the bones.
~~Barbara Turner
Oh. GREAT word choices here and I love that turn of the third line. Mercy!
After Summer
She poses
coquettishly
but the pretty is gone.
All that remains
are the bones.
~~Barbara Turner
Oh. GREAT word choices here and I love that turn of the third line. Mercy!
The Emperor?s Tailors at Work Once Again
Umbrella skeleton sits
and awaits,
her new robe?s fastening
festival.
Dreams of turquoise and bling.
Oh, my! You have imbued this umbrella skeleton (umbrellaton?) with such personality!
Who doesn’t need a little bling?? Nice.
The Emperor?s Tailors at Work Once Again
Umbrella skeleton sits
and awaits,
her new robe?s fastening
festival.
Dreams of turquoise and bling.
Oh, my! You have imbued this umbrella skeleton (umbrellaton?) with such personality!
Who doesn’t need a little bling?? Nice.
Arrows point to the sky
reminding us to look up
and wish on a star.
That’s beautiful, Anne! I like that it’s about beauty, not starkness:>)
I love the simplicity here and the timeless sense of hope.
Arrows point to the sky
reminding us to look up
and wish on a star.
That’s beautiful, Anne! I like that it’s about beauty, not starkness:>)
I love the simplicity here and the timeless sense of hope.
Not sure which one so I’ll post all 3.
THE DAWNING OF OUR AWNING
Being sent inside
Is when I start to buckle up
For winter?s frosty ride.
ONCE I SEE OUR AWNING
Being brought inside
I begin to buckle up
For winter?s frosty ride.
BEACH UMBRELLAS
Baldachins stripped from slanted
Metallic branches
Rumpled in dust and shame,
Remnants of a
Hurricanes furor.
© Charles Waters 2013 all rights reserved.
Not sure which one so I’ll post all 3.
THE DAWNING OF OUR AWNING
Being sent inside
Is when I start to buckle up
For winter?s frosty ride.
ONCE I SEE OUR AWNING
Being brought inside
I begin to buckle up
For winter?s frosty ride.
BEACH UMBRELLAS
Baldachins stripped from slanted
Metallic branches
Rumpled in dust and shame,
Remnants of a
Hurricanes furor.
© Charles Waters 2013 all rights reserved.