??
Photo: Laura Salas
Wake up your poetry brains with 15 Words or Less (guidelines are here)!
Three things this photo makes me think of:
1) Medusa
2) Mermaid castle
3) Duck feet
And here’s my first draft!
Floor Plans
Beaver architect
pulls soggy floor plans
from fur coveralls,
gnaws thoughtfully
on a pine pencil
–Laura Purdie Salas, all rights reserved
Now it’s your turn! Have fun? and stick to? 15 WORDS OR LESS!??(Title doesn’t count toward word count:>)? Also, I’m at a 4‑day Story Masters writing intensive, so I won’t be able to comment today. Sorry! But I can’t wait to read what you come up with on my lunch break:>)
146 Responses
Neighborhood Redevelopment
Behind the dam,
deep
beneath still waters
lie streets
backyards
and Sarah’s favorite doll–
forever.
Ooooh, I like this! Its got an air of mystery and a tinge of sadness! Very good!
How sad. The doll, a poignant detail, bringing the loss down to one little girl.
Lovely mood to this. Have you read Jane Yolen’s Letting Swift River Go? This poem makes me think of it.
Oh. The aftermath of a flood. Very good.
I like the still life you created, Diane. It makes me wonder what else is hidden below the surface.
Love this! It has so much personality in so few words.
Heartbreaking poem.
Diane,
I really like your penultimate line, it personalizes the whole poem. Well done.
Neighborhood Redevelopment
Behind the dam,
deep
beneath still waters
lie streets
backyards
and Sarah’s favorite doll–
forever.
Ooooh, I like this! Its got an air of mystery and a tinge of sadness! Very good!
How sad. The doll, a poignant detail, bringing the loss down to one little girl.
Lovely mood to this. Have you read Jane Yolen’s Letting Swift River Go? This poem makes me think of it.
Oh. The aftermath of a flood. Very good.
I like the still life you created, Diane. It makes me wonder what else is hidden below the surface.
Love this! It has so much personality in so few words.
Heartbreaking poem.
Diane,
I really like your penultimate line, it personalizes the whole poem. Well done.
This made me think of the island of Santorini in Greece. I had the incredible privilege to visit there a few years ago. It is an island created by a great volcano eruption in the 1630s BCE. My poem is exactly 15 words.
Lost long ago
far below
Thira, her volcano
fiery and fierce–
a fallen black pebble.
This made me think of the island of Santorini in Greece. I had the incredible privilege to visit there a few years ago. It is an island created by a great volcano eruption in the 1630s BCE. My poem is exactly 15 words.
Lost long ago
far below
Thira, her volcano
fiery and fierce–
a fallen black pebble.
Only part of me
Reaches the surface
The rest remains
A foggy mystery
Very cool picture! It took me a while to get what it was, but after I did, I loved it!!! Great poems so far!
Oh I like foggy mystery and the ominous tone here.
I like the contrast between surface and foggy mystery–nice!
I like your take on this. Foggy mystery. Great!
Ooh, I like this!
Only part of me
Reaches the surface
The rest remains
A foggy mystery
Very cool picture! It took me a while to get what it was, but after I did, I loved it!!! Great poems so far!
Oh I like foggy mystery and the ominous tone here.
I like the contrast between surface and foggy mystery–nice!
I like your take on this. Foggy mystery. Great!
Ooh, I like this!
THE OCTOPUS
Silently slithering,
arms all a‑quivering,
r e a c h i n g to feel,
and find the next meal.
Love slithering, a‑quivering and how you stretched out reaching. And as always, a weekly wonderful rhyme.
I can picture those quivering arms!
I like your idea that it’s an octopus.
Also like your rhyme.
Of course, Octopus! Brilliant!
Wonderful image and rhymes!
Nice rhyming, Cindy. I like how you’ve packed so much information and created a mood in so few words. Excellent.
THE OCTOPUS
Silently slithering,
arms all a‑quivering,
r e a c h i n g to feel,
and find the next meal.
Love slithering, a‑quivering and how you stretched out reaching. And as always, a weekly wonderful rhyme.
I can picture those quivering arms!
I like your idea that it’s an octopus.
Also like your rhyme.
Of course, Octopus! Brilliant!
Wonderful image and rhymes!
Nice rhyming, Cindy. I like how you’ve packed so much information and created a mood in so few words. Excellent.
In a Tippy Canoe
Didn’t want to go fishing.
Don’t like the view.
Imagining monsters,
and toe-biters too!
I like how your title (tippy) reflects the narrators point-o-view…clearly a land-lover!
I like “toe-biters.” Good reasoning for not wanting to go!
Your poem made me smile. A tippy canoe.
Wow! I love all the different ideas people have.
LOL! I thought of a canoe, too, but not a tippy one. Gotta watch out for those!
In a Tippy Canoe
Didn’t want to go fishing.
Don’t like the view.
Imagining monsters,
and toe-biters too!
I like how your title (tippy) reflects the narrators point-o-view…clearly a land-lover!
I like “toe-biters.” Good reasoning for not wanting to go!
Your poem made me smile. A tippy canoe.
Wow! I love all the different ideas people have.
LOL! I thought of a canoe, too, but not a tippy one. Gotta watch out for those!
I immediately thought of the Thanksgiving meal.
Incognito
The desperate turkey
in camouflage
roosts among the woodpile
praying once again for pardon.
Love your incognito turkey’s choice of camouflage!
Your turkey idea has me laughing out loud. Love it!
Oh yes, I see those turkey hoping to live past Thanksgiving, rooting around the forest floor!
Ha, haa!
Poor turkey! Love this.
I immediately thought of the Thanksgiving meal.
Incognito
The desperate turkey
in camouflage
roosts among the woodpile
praying once again for pardon.
Love your incognito turkey’s choice of camouflage!
Your turkey idea has me laughing out loud. Love it!
Oh yes, I see those turkey hoping to live past Thanksgiving, rooting around the forest floor!
Ha, haa!
Poor turkey! Love this.
Oh how funny!
Thanks Ellie. I couldn’t resist. I usually go with a first impression, and Tom Turkey was it!
Oh how funny!
Thanks Ellie. I couldn’t resist. I usually go with a first impression, and Tom Turkey was it!
Streamside Race
Stick plunges
rides a riffle
ricochets
rolls
s l o w s
swirls
rebounds
zips
hits a snag
trapped.
Love all your r and s sounds!
This is fabulous. I love the varied pacing and many images of the stick’s water ride, until it’s stuck. Your poems are always impressive.
Your choice of words are impressive. I like this.
Wow, love your word choices Buffy, especially rides a riffle and snag.
Love all the verbs! I especially like “ricochets” and the line “rides a riffle”.
Streamside Race
Stick plunges
rides a riffle
ricochets
rolls
s l o w s
swirls
rebounds
zips
hits a snag
trapped.
Love all your r and s sounds!
This is fabulous. I love the varied pacing and many images of the stick’s water ride, until it’s stuck. Your poems are always impressive.
Your choice of words are impressive. I like this.
Wow, love your word choices Buffy, especially rides a riffle and snag.
Love all the verbs! I especially like “ricochets” and the line “rides a riffle”.
November
The month poised
between tepid and cold
color and its absence
life and certain death.
Diane Mayr, all rights reserved
I love everyone’s takes on the photo. All I saw was the cold and grey. 🙁
The picture did look cold and grey, and you turned it round into a lovely poem.
Good job.
^ I agree. I love your poem and thoughts about November.
November does bring the dark ones out, this is great!
November
The month poised
between tepid and cold
color and its absence
life and certain death.
Diane Mayr, all rights reserved
I love everyone’s takes on the photo. All I saw was the cold and grey. 🙁
The picture did look cold and grey, and you turned it round into a lovely poem.
Good job.
^ I agree. I love your poem and thoughts about November.
November does bring the dark ones out, this is great!
This picture had me “stumped” at first as nothing pretty came to mind. I love how you’ve painted November as a month of transition. Lines two and three are my favorites.
This picture had me “stumped” at first as nothing pretty came to mind. I love how you’ve painted November as a month of transition. Lines two and three are my favorites.
Such superb poems this morning!
Island
Island stretches her toes,
curls them into ocean bottom
still warm from old volcanoes.
?Kate Coombs
Love your take on the photo and the image of an island curling it’s toes in water warmed by old volcanoes!
So creative and relaxing!
Oh, I love this personification of an island. How clever!
Such superb poems this morning!
Island
Island stretches her toes,
curls them into ocean bottom
still warm from old volcanoes.
?Kate Coombs
Love your take on the photo and the image of an island curling it’s toes in water warmed by old volcanoes!
So creative and relaxing!
Oh, I love this personification of an island. How clever!
I love this. So creative. And on a chilly morning, the warm ocean bottom sounds inviting for cold toes. Fabulous job.
I agree. Toes curling in warm water sounds good today.
I like your idea.
I love this. So creative. And on a chilly morning, the warm ocean bottom sounds inviting for cold toes. Fabulous job.
I agree. Toes curling in warm water sounds good today.
I like your idea.
I just couldn’t get my eyes off that strange looking lump.
Alien Creature
He floats alone
and longs to find
another creature
of his kind.
That stump does look like it came from out of this world. Nice take.
I like your rhyme!
I hope he finds another lump soon.
I love your interpretation and I knew you would find a perfect rhyme.
I like the longing feeling in this and your rhyme.
I just couldn’t get my eyes off that strange looking lump.
Alien Creature
He floats alone
and longs to find
another creature
of his kind.
That stump does look like it came from out of this world. Nice take.
I like your rhyme!
I hope he finds another lump soon.
I love your interpretation and I knew you would find a perfect rhyme.
I like the longing feeling in this and your rhyme.
REPURPOSED
Once
my slim limbs
reached for sky.
Now I lie
muddy,
cradling tiny tadpoles.
Andria W. Rosenbaum, all rights reserved
Perfect title and great images!
Yes. A great description of the remains of a tree.
I like the internal rhyme — slim limbs.
It sounds like a career mom becoming a stay at home mum 😉
REPURPOSED
Once
my slim limbs
reached for sky.
Now I lie
muddy,
cradling tiny tadpoles.
Andria W. Rosenbaum, all rights reserved
Perfect title and great images!
Yes. A great description of the remains of a tree.
I like the internal rhyme — slim limbs.
It sounds like a career mom becoming a stay at home mum 😉
Great poem, Laura. I am stumped for what the picture is, apart from the tree roots. Great shot! (Oh it’s under water I get it.
First someone lopped off my body
Now they are drowning my feet
A mere toad stool
Now I’m feeling sorry for the tree! Love that last line.
Your feet drowning. Hm–m. You probably have come closest to what the picture really is.
A tree reduced to a toad stool! Good thinking.
Great poem, Laura. I am stumped for what the picture is, apart from the tree roots. Great shot! (Oh it’s under water I get it.
First someone lopped off my body
Now they are drowning my feet
A mere toad stool
Now I’m feeling sorry for the tree! Love that last line.
Your feet drowning. Hm–m. You probably have come closest to what the picture really is.
A tree reduced to a toad stool! Good thinking.
Laura, your beaver and his soggy floor plans brought the biggest smile to my face this morning! 🙂
The photo reminds me of camping in the BWCA:
IN MY CANOE
paddle,
paddle,
glide?
skimming the lake
smooth and still,
ever watchful,
seeking
rocks,
logs,
wildlife.
Laura, your beaver and his soggy floor plans brought the biggest smile to my face this morning! 🙂
The photo reminds me of camping in the BWCA:
IN MY CANOE
paddle,
paddle,
glide?
skimming the lake
smooth and still,
ever watchful,
seeking
rocks,
logs,
wildlife.
I like the shape of your poem and the peaceful feel of it.
I like the shape of your poem and the peaceful feel of it.
A Tree’s Life
Looking,
leaning,
longing for
the sea,
living,
vicariously,
through generations
inching
toward a
watery dream.
~~Barbara Turner
Love your “l” sounds and the dreamy quality. Nice job.
A Tree’s Life
Looking,
leaning,
longing for
the sea,
living,
vicariously,
through generations
inching
toward a
watery dream.
~~Barbara Turner
Love your “l” sounds and the dreamy quality. Nice job.
This made me think of the island of Santorini in Greece. I had the incredible privilege to visit there a few years ago. It is an island created by a great volcano eruption in the 1630s BCE. My poem is exactly 15 words.
Lost long ago
far below
Thira, her volcano
fiery and fierce?
a fallen black pebble.
This made me think of the island of Santorini in Greece. I had the incredible privilege to visit there a few years ago. It is an island created by a great volcano eruption in the 1630s BCE. My poem is exactly 15 words.
Lost long ago
far below
Thira, her volcano
fiery and fierce?
a fallen black pebble.
Wow–what a wonderful group of poems today. Mythical, sad, silly, beautiful, thoughtful, spooky…you guys have run the gamut. So nice to read through these after an intense day! Thank you!
Wow–what a wonderful group of poems today. Mythical, sad, silly, beautiful, thoughtful, spooky…you guys have run the gamut. So nice to read through these after an intense day! Thank you!
I float around
In peaceful bliss
Beauty is within
Thank goodness for this !
- Anne McKenna
I float around
In peaceful bliss
Beauty is within
Thank goodness for this !
- Anne McKenna
HOWDY NEIGHBOR!
Through knobby pines
On ocean?s floor
Creatures visit
Door to door.
© Charles Waters 2013 all rights reserved.
HOWDY NEIGHBOR!
Through knobby pines
On ocean?s floor
Creatures visit
Door to door.
© Charles Waters 2013 all rights reserved.